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Thread: Euphemisms for the ages...

  1. #1
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    Talking Euphemisms for the ages...

    Thought I'd start a new one tonight...kinda bored, don't cha know - ya sure you betcha.

    See what kind of euphemism you can dig up from your memory banks, or get all smarty pants & make yer own...

    Keep it clean & somewhat tasteful...but mostly, post what makes you laugh...

    After watching the parking lot camera this evening, I'll start with:

    Throwin' down a stomach pizza, as a euphemism for:

    MAN that little guy left a big pizza...

    I know y'all gonna come up with some pretty awful stuff, just TRY to keep it almost within the realm of "questionably good taste"...

  2. #2
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    let the Brits chime in.....

    From what I can tell, 50% of their language is based on it...

    Examples:

    Its Cats and Dogs outside (its raining alot)

    Courtesy of Green Street Hooligans:
    Hes in Rubble (Barney Rubble, Trouble)
    Bees and Honey (Money)

  3. #3
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    'Gooder n grits'

    'slicker n snot'

    Wifey laughs her butt off when I use this one (but ya gotta turn on your best southern drawl when you say it)

    'It don't make no nevermind to me'

    I know, they're not really euphamisms but my brain ain't quite woke up yet so it's the best I could do.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    Put a smiley after you say that Bub.

  4. #4
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    Here's a few I've picked up working with the military:

    "Volun-told" - EXAMPLE: "We're doing our monthly <insert volunteer project here> this weekend, and I expect you all to be there."

    "Tell the story right" - TRANSLATION: We need to justify our funding for the next fiscal year, and since our efforts to-date have largely failed, we're going to invent a best-case scenario story and practice telling it until we're sure the general will believe it.

    And some that my wife likes to use:

    "Maybe" - TRANSLATION: I don't want to say "no" so I'm just not going to say yes and hope you forget to ask again.

    "Are you sure you don't want to do <insert thing I don't want to do here>?" - TRANSLATION: I'm giving you a chance to agree before I get mad for having to tell you to do it.

    "Me: Is something wrong? Her: No" - TRANSLATION - YES, and you better figure it out because if you're too dumb to know then I'm going to be even more mad.

  5. #5
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    Husbands/Boyfriends will know about these....

    The "Honey-do" list. (our list of stuff to do)

    "We" (Example: "You know WE should hang those pictures today while I am at work")

  6. #6
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    ""We" (Example: "You know WE should hang those pictures today while I am at work")"

    Warning: Last time that line was used, I responded without thinking "What's this 'we' crap". With therapy, I learned to walk again.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by tom4bren View Post
    ""We" (Example: "You know WE should hang those pictures today while I am at work")"

    Warning: Last time that line was used, I responded without thinking "What's this 'we' crap". With therapy, I learned to walk again.
    I usually reply with "Well we are <whatever I am doing at the moment> so we'll have to do that when we are finished"....

    its kinda a long running joke, so I don't get hit

  8. #8
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    as I tell my maintenance staff..

    There is no "I" in we.. as in when I tell them "we" need to get a certain project completed.

  9. #9
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    I like this one...even saw it used once in an AutoWeek article...

    "goes like stink!"....meaning, it goes really fast
    VX KAT
    ....the adventure BEGINS ANEW! ...2015......
    Remember that life is not measured in the breaths you take, but rather in the moments that take your breath away.

  10. #10
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    Dumb as a box of rocks

    Not the sharpest tack in the pack

    Not the sharpest knife in the drawer

    A couple cans shy of a six pack

    Goes like a scalded dog (thanks for jogging my brain into gear Kat)

    Needs a checkup from the neck up

    Fell out the ugly tree, & hit every branch on the way down


    We're just gettin' started here...

  11. #11
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    "WHOLY CRAP".. it means "OH MY GOD"....or "NO WAY"...or "WHAT".. or "YOUVE GOT TO BE KIDDING"..


    "WOW"..means "SICK"... or "TIGHT"..or"WAY OUT"..or"GROVY".. or "KEEN"
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]...

  12. #12
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    Wink

    "She's a Tom Dempsey." (A gal that looks good 'til she's closer than 63 yards)

    "Not the Brightest Bulb on the Scoreboard."

    "A few cards short of a full deck."

    "Jokem if they can't take a f--k."
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]"If its fast and reliable, its not cheap;
    if its fast and cheap, its not reliable;
    if its cheap and reliable, its not fast."


    If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

  13. #13
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    Couple crayons shy of a 64 pack..

    Smooth move Ex Lax!

    Is a frog's arse watertight?

    Does a bear **** (crap) in the woods?

    Does a cat have an arse?

    You could sell sand to an Arab

    You could sell ice to an Eskimo

    If I want your opinion I'll give it to you.

    He doesn't know s**t from shinola

    You're a fine example of a person that wears a beanie with the propeller on the inside

  14. #14
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    About as sharp as a marble.
    A few clowns short of a circus.
    Not the brightest bulb on the Christmas Tree.
    A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
    I wish I had a blueprint for his brain; I'm trying to build an idiot.
    An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
    He only has one oar in the water.
    A few peas short of a casserole.
    Doesn't have all her cornflakes in one box.
    One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
    One taco short of a combination plate.
    A few feathers short of a whole duck.
    All foam, no beer.
    The cheese slid off her cracker.
    Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.
    Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
    An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
    As smart as bait.
    Chimney's clogged.
    Larry S.
    99 Astral Silver VX (176k)
    91 Porsche 928 S4 (73k)

  15. #15
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    sharp as a tack..wonder what end they are talking about....

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