1. I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

2. I ordered a burger at McDonalds and the kid behind the counter asked
"can you afford fries with that?"

3. The bank returned one of my checks marked "Insufficient Funds"
I called them and asked if they meant mine or theirs?

4. Hotwheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than G.M.

5. The Mafia is laying off judges.