Can't let it go...

[Anita]

I appologize in advance for stirring things back up, but this has been bothering me and I simply can not let it go. I have tried just forgetting about it, but I am having difficulty doing so.

Know that you are of value to us and this forum.

I was one of many who contacted Scott to pull the plug on that guy. I have learned the hard way that inserting myself into fights with those kind of personalities escalates the warfare geometrically. So I have learned to stay out and do what I can behind the scenes. Right or wrong, I have the sense that your brethren and sistren felt the same way.

When the next altercation occurs, PM each other for help. Sometimes you have to elbow your bonehead family members before they get the message.

Dont go away JAMAS. You arent allowed.

[Ldub]

Know that you are of value to us and this forum.

I was one of many who contacted Scott to pull the plug on that guy. I have learned the hard way that inserting myself into fights with those kind of personalities escalates the warfare geometrically. So I have learned to stay out and do what I can behind the scenes. Right or wrong, I have the sense that your brethren and sistren felt the same way.

When the next altercation occurs, PM each other for help. Sometimes you have to elbow your bonehead family members before they get the message.

Dont go away JAMAS. You arent allowed.

Well said..

[navistar]

Jamas,

I read the posts and here's my observations.

The original post was a 'drive by', completely devoid of even the most basic information that any person would expect to be included in even a classified newspaper ad. It was perfunctory and odd because of that.

I would have posted the exact reply you did under the circumstances. I saw nothing wrong in your reply.

I was disturbed with the 'over-the-top' responses, especially with all the profanity that went on and on. I felt uncomfortable that an owner of a Vehicross would come across like that since I hold owners in high regard. I am not proud of this owner or husband. He is not a peace maker but is a trouble maker. If this is the way he reacts to every day life then he is a troubled person and she must have her hands full.

I run into jerks on occasion, such is life, so you must let it go. There is enough intelligence, wisdom and love on this site to overcome a little hate.

My regards to you,

Navi

[vt_maverick]

Let it go Neo er... JAMAS.

Seriously, the best thing you can do on a forum when something like this happens is to email the admins, close the thread, and never view it again. People with that kind of just-below-the-surface anger feed on conflict, so putting them in virtual time-out by simply ignoring them is the best (and funniest if you think about it) way to deal with them.

[JAMAS]

Thanks guys.

I appreciate the feedback. I feel much better now that I have gotten it out there and have heard a lot of supportive comments. I understand how things can be misinterpreted and why that could upset someone. However, a misinterpreted comment should never have invoked a response like that.

Thanks again to everyone for the support. It is much appreciated.

[ZEUS]

I'm probably gonna flex an unwanted X chromosome here...

Jamas, You know I followed the whole thing as it unfolded. What I saw was someone who wanted to use this fine forum to do one thing - sell their VX free of charge. I view people like that almost as spammers except they may help someone else join the group for the RIGHT reasons. I like that Scott wants to install new protocol for those folks who only join to sell a VX. However, I have to say your phrasing was poor. If you wanted to say "it seems so many people have a hard time creating a decent ad for the vehicle they wish to sell." you could have done it with more tact. I read what you wrote as if you were singling that person out; and effectively, it did. What I got a kick out of was both of you were doing the same thing - phrasing things poorly! You called them on it and then it bit you in the butt because of your phrasing. They reacted almost the same way you may be now by feeling singled out. The difference is, you are comfortable here and they are new and unknowing of how we play. You continued to poke at that person when you said "feel free to offer an apology"... They really had no reason to apologize for reacting to how they felt they were being treated by you. If you would have followed your own advice and offered your own apology instead of asking them to, the situtation would not have continued to escalate. I have never seen a time when the "A-double S" came thru unedited like that. So keep in mind people have delivered that word before, it was just kinda shocking to see it letter for letter and over and over again in one thread. That's what stood out to me in that thread and that is on them, but again, they didn't know as this is unfamiliar territory. Some forums allow cursing. Overall, I'm sorry, but I have to say you most likely put that chip on their shoulder...

Dude, my over-the-top style to everything gets me in trouble every day... every day! I try to not let it get to me, and just accept that I am not perfect, instead of feeling like a scumbag because of my sarcastic wit and tendency to offend. Some people take what I say or write, misread it, rearrange it, create offense out of it... yada yada... sometimes tho... I just plainly screw up. And sometimes I have to realize I screwed up before I can let it go...

You have no reason to leave this forum. If anyone hated your approach to that newbie, they'll get over it. Keep in mind too, what usually stands out on the forum for a person is usually something that involves them directly. So nobody is thinking badly of you as most didn't notice or care enough to remember the names of the people posting.

[tom4bren]

Oh Crap. Zeus had his lightning bolts out now.

BTW, I've got a 3000GT for sale. It runs good when it runs and the body is in real good shape except for a few bondo spots. Anyone interested.

[JAMAS]

Oh Crap. Zeus had his lightning bolts out now.

BTW, I've got a 3000GT for sale. It runs good when it runs and the body is in real good shape except for a few bondo spots. Anyone interested.

You funny

[CrnCnn]

BTW, I've got a 3000GT for sale. It runs good when it runs and the body is in real good shape except for a few bondo spots. Anyone interested.

I cant be sure. Does it have a steering wheel?

[ZEUS]

...And on which side is this steering wheel you speak of?

[Gussie2000]

Hi you !
I'm interest in car you got for sale.
Can't you tell if it comes with an engine ?

[psychos2]

I'm probably gonna flex an unwanted X chromosome here...

Jamas, You know I followed the whole thing as it unfolded. What I saw was someone who wanted to use this fine forum to do one thing - sell their VX free of charge. I view people like that almost as spammers except they may help someone else join the group for the RIGHT reasons. I like that Scott wants to install new protocol for those folks who only join to sell a VX. However, I have to say your phrasing was poor. If you wanted to say "it seems so many people have a hard time creating a decent ad for the vehicle they wish to sell." you could have done it with more tact. I read what you wrote as if you were singling that person out; and effectively, it did. What I got a kick out of was both of you were doing the same thing - phrasing things poorly! You called them on it and then it bit you in the butt because of your phrasing. They reacted almost the same way you may be now by feeling singled out. The difference is, you are comfortable here and they are new and unknowing of how we play. You continued to poke at that person when you said "feel free to offer an apology"... They really had no reason to apologize for reacting to how they felt they were being treated by you. If you would have followed your own advice and offered your own apology instead of asking them to, the situtation would not have continued to escalate. I have never seen a time when the "A-double S" came thru unedited like that. So keep in mind people have delivered that word before, it was just kinda shocking to see it letter for letter and over and over again in one thread. That's what stood out to me in that thread and that is on them, but again, they didn't know as this is unfamiliar territory. Some forums allow cursing. Overall, I'm sorry, but I have to say you most likely put that chip on their shoulder...

I second that.Except the part about selling for free.If it is a vx and someone here is looking for one as they always are than what is the problem.A donation would be nice ,but it is not required.And I hate seeing people jump on someone saying they need to donate.That drives people away.If everyone has to donate than there needs to be a membership fee otherwise don't hound people.And the joking part about the ad (in this post) does not help matters either.Again drives people away,makes us look like a bunch of ********. shawn

[tomdietrying]

Jamas,
I got your back. We we rumble them there nasty jeepsters, you can count on me.
Peace.
Tom

p.s.
Zeus, I'm not talking about you. I love your jeep!

[ZEUS]

I second that.Except the part about selling for free.If it is a vx and someone here is looking for one as they always are than what is the problem.A donation would be nice ,but it is not required.And I hate seeing people jump on someone saying they need to donate.That drives people away.If everyone has to donate than there needs to be a membership fee otherwise don't hound people.And the joking part about the ad (in this post) does not help matters either.Again drives people away,makes us look like a bunch of ********. shawn

Well I have learned (the hard way) that Scott really is the only one who has any say regarding how contributions should be received or requested. He knows what goes on behind the scenes here and it seems he feels imposing a small fee on those who are added to our member list only because they want to make money on a quick sale is the right thing to do. I am just verbally supporting his decision. I also support Scott's wish to let people support the site under their own accord... And I have no quams with the rest of us rallying to help make up any difference in the lack of yearly financial needs under our own accord since 'hounding' brings 'discontent' among 'users'.

[Osteomata]

I'm sure glad I never get involved in contentious threads.