Here's a diagram:
The wire to look for is a blue one the diagram calls start output (it goes to the Automatic Transmission Mode Switch). It is only grounded when in Park or Neutral, making it a perfect safety switch.
Another mod you can do is wire the remote to open both doors when you press it once, then the back door when pressed twice. Both this mod and the wiring schematic was sent to me by a guy down in Florida who wired his VX in this manner (Gary Bucklew of Autodoc in Largo, FL).
The Passenger door lock control relay is the one to access to wire the popper to trigger off the second press of the factory remote. Just splice the two light green/black trace wires together (cut the one that is the true trigger) so that both door locks unlock on the first press of the remote (thus bypassing the relay), then get the wire that originally went to the passenger door lock actuator (the one you cut), and use it to trigger your relay for the popper. The factory used the passenger door relay as an inhibitor relay to NOT open the door on the first press.
Note that I have not done the second mod, so I'm not able to give better, more detailed information. I'm planning on going to an aftermarket alarm, so making this change is moot.
-- John